Eric Lawson
HOT MESS IN A COW COSTUME
Donna is plastered once again
Traversing the neighborhood in a
Rented cow costume
No one stops to ask her why
It’s late March and raining, the
Middle of the day, and she’s
Extremely hammered
She moos at passing teenage boys,
Yelling: “Which one of you
Fine, young Southern
Gentlemen wants to
Refresh yourself with some
Ice-cold sweet tea and then
Help a lady out by churning
Her butter, hmm?”
She rubs her plastic utters
Suggestively at the mailman
She molests her neighbor’s flagpole
No one flinches or bats an eye
Since her fourth divorce, her sad,
Drunken displays have
Become ever-so-frequent
She urinates through her costume
And cries out for rocky road
Ice cream between swigs of
Cheap, warm whiskey
She passes out, unceremoniously,
Into a half-empty kiddy pool
The neighbors sigh and go about
Their business in peace
Remarks one to another: “Well, at
Least this time she wasn’t
Using the jump rope naked
TO SEE ERIC'S PERFORMANCE OF THIS POEM AT THE PUBLISHING PARTY GO TO:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gprzrB-NKQM
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